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Each day I feel I am merely existing and not living. I was widowed at 32 and have remained single. I feel unfulfilled with my job, my kids, and in this small town. I've always been restless, but I always made do. My kids are teenagers. As I get older I want to do something drastically different with my life. A year ago I corresponded with a man living in Alaska. I chickened out because it seemed too hard. I didn't feel I could live in the Alaskan bush after spending all my life taking indoor plumbing for granted. At the time I was filled with doubt. Now I regret not making the attempt. All I want is to reconstruct my life so I wake up each morning with gratitude for being alive. What can I do? Sherry

Sherry, you have spent your life being someone else's child, someone else's wife, someone else's mother. How much time have you spent being yourself? Who are you, and who did you want to be?

You had dreams, you had aspirations. What happened to them? Search the scrapbook of your memory, and find them again. That is the place to begin. Which of those items still stirs your spirit? What can you do, what can you change, what would it take to make any of them possible?

You are at a weak point, so it is tempting to reconsider ideas you've already passed on. The Alaskan wilderness is someone else's dream. You dream of indoor plumbing and running water. Don't move from what you have to less. Move from what you have to more.

You are still a young woman. You have most of a lifetime in front of you. Nearly all paths are still open to you. Give yourself time. Enjoy exploring all the possibilities. When you find what connects, act!

Wayne & Tamara

Authors and columnists Wayne and Tamara Mitchell can be reached at www.WayneAndTamara.com. Send letters to: Direct Answers, PO Box 964, Springfield, MO 65801 or e-mail: DirectAnswers@WayneAndTamara.com.